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- Yesterday while I was at the office, someone straggled down the alley by my house and left behind a trail of the following: onion pieces, Hershey's chocolates, kids' drink mix packets, a carving knife, a tire pressure gauge, two belts, a pair of tall black socks, a pen, an unopened can of beans. I tried to piece together the clues to figure out what kind of day this person was having, but I couldn't figure anything out. Were they eating the raw onion? The chocolate pieces they left behind weren't opened - like, they didn't leave the wrappers, they left the chocolate. Why would you eat a raw onion and not chocolate if you had chocolate? Was the drink mix gross? If not, why wouldn't you keep those? The knife was a little disturbing to see dropped in the alley - long and serrated, with a forked end. Did they rob someone's kitchen? What did the tire pressure gauge have to do with anything? Will they come back looking for their booty? I threw away the comestibles and the pen, composted the onion pieces, and I'll donate the rest, I suppose - there's nothing wrong with it, it's just weird.
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