I have always been an insufferable twit
Friday, Oct. 30, 2015 - 10:57

The other night the moon came up large and yellow. I rode my bike towards home, towards the Big Dipper in the sky. It hadn't started raining yet. It was beautiful. This weekend, an atmospheric river is headed our way - a river floating in the sky, coming to drench us! Mother Nature, what are you doing?

It's getting cold, seasonably, and I can't complain. Mother Nature has done a good job this year, "atmospheric river" notwithstanding.

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Somehow I stumbled into the year 2008 through my entries here. I think I was looking for a story I'd written about that time and then I kept on reading other entries. Fun, it's fun to remember those days.

But I'm pretty sure I was miserable, or kind of miserable, although you can't tell from the entries here. Or maybe I wasn't miserable and I've forgotten.

THEN I WENT FURTHER BACK IN TIME.

I fired up the old external harddrive, looking for the pictures I took with Mary's Nikon. Found them. AND I found FILES FROM THE YEAR 1992. AND 1994. AND 1996. AND YEARS IN BETWEEN, AS WELL AS YEARS SINCE. I found a paper I wrote in high school about zits. I found an essay I wrote about the Second Amendment, which I don't remember at all. It's a pretty hilarious paper. The conclusion is a giant slippery slope, and I even acknowledge that it's a slippery slope, but then I go ahead and slide down that slope to the very bottom: If they take away our guns, they will take away EVERYTHING ELSE.

I also found a story I wrote in which the narrator is an insufferable twit, and I'm not sure if I was trying to make her an insufferable twit or if that's just the way I earnestly was. Pretty obviously teenage girl, so very teenage girl. I was an insufferable twit, and I still am, although I know it, so is it still insufferable twittiness? Yes, you can't acknowledge that away. The best thing to do is to shut up.

Also I found tons of shit from when I was married, and before. I wish I hadn't saved every goddamn thing in the world, because what do I do with it now? I don't want to delete it, because that's my life, but I kind of wish it didn't exist. Ugh.