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Ants and stinky dog and gay marriage and the planets
Friday, Jun. 26, 2015 - 14:42

Hey oh wow good job, Supreme Court! So much going on this week. Go America! Wooooooooooooo! YEEEEAHHHHH. AMERICA.

I hope you guys have been going out and looking at Venus and Jupiter lately. They are the bombdiggity right now. Go look at them tonight. Please. Do it. I finally saw Saturn last night.

What's going on? I don't know. I've been tired and it's getting hot. I've been icing my knee the last couple nights to try to keep it from becoming a thing, but I think it's going to be a thing tomorrow morning anyway. Tomorrow is going to be 101 degrees and I'm doing a half marathon up at a mountain pass in the morning. I'd like to say I'll be done by 10:30, but I won't be. I may be done by 11:30. It's going to be hot and hard. I am smart. My quads are still shot.

I had a really funny joke here blaming the hot weather on the gays but I deleted it because I've finished reading the book So You've Been Publicly Shamed and I don't want to be publicly shamed. I suppose that's harder to do with a DiaryLand(c) diary than it is with a twitter, but nonetheless. So you are missing out on a really funny joke because I don't want some idiot to come around here and think that I really believe the gays have brought about the hot weather. The second part of the joke was that the gays are even more powerful than that Obama guy because at least HE never made it get to 101 degrees in June. Or maybe I should be blaming the Supreme Court. They make a few rulings, the weather gets record-breakingly hot. Thanks a lot, SCOTUS. Well, the joke will never be fully developed because I scuttled it in the production stage.

The puppy rolled in a dead fish last night and he stinks real bad (or real good, in his opinion). Good thing for him he's so cute, otherwise we wouldn't put up with him.

I found a massive frenzy of ants last night and I'm afraid I'm going to have to launch a new attack. I'd decided that all this anti-ant stuff is gross and inhumane - like pouring boiling water into an ant nest, fucking barbaric. And ants are neat and awesome little creatures. However, they can't be cool motherfuckers, they can't just live in moderation, they have to take over the entire yard and farm their asshole aphids all over my strawberries and bite my toes, and so I must respond in kind. They've dug out caverns under the sidewalks and the garage and probably the house. I think everything's going to collapse into a giant ant sinkhole someday. And so this is war. I did not want to have to do this but my hand has been forced.

Okay well. Stay safe.

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