PILATES (etc.)
Wednesday, Sept. 09, 2009 - 21:00

First pilates class today. I realize that should be capitalized but I'm not going to do it. I also usually don't capitalize diaryland, do I. (By the way, diaryland is ten years old this month! Ten years! I will not direct you to my old entries - ten years ago I was a huge moron.)

As I was saying. Pilates. So I've been doing yoga a couple years now, or actually 1.75 years. And yoga is nice. And pilates, well, it's different from yoga. I'm used to the instructor doing the class with us, know what I'm saying? Well. The pilates instructor did not do the class with us today. She was dressed in camo. She walked around us like a drill sergeant, making us do terrible things. Pilates moves are similar to yoga moves but they are done much, much more quickly and to much more dastardly effect.

It was pretty awesome. I will have the strongest abs of my life in a few weeks. Who am I kidding, actually - I already have the strongest abs of my life. But in a few weeks I will be UNSTOPPABLE.

p.s. I've been reading conservative blogs. They're kind of hilarious. Did you know that BHO might be the AC?!? True story! I'm not saying he is, I'm saying he probably is. And if he is, we'll know today, because it's 9/9/9. Also, did you know that hand-washing is for commies? It's true! Jesus tells us in the Bible not to wash our hands! Only the AC would make us wash our hands on 9/9/9! Don't wash your hands today, serious! Not that hand-washing is bad, it's just that, Jesus says kids don't have to wash their hands, and kids are special, and BHO is the AC, and also did you know that he wasn't even born in the United States? He was born in like Ireland or something, the bastard. And my heart bleeds for all the 10 to 15 million people who didn't get to read this entry because they were aborted by BHO. Also, online translation tools are bad because they're destroying the Tower of Babel that God built with his own two hands.