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particles My immune system has started up after an extended period of inactivity. When's the last time I was sick? Was it a year and a half ago? I don't remember. Sunday night my tonsils turned into bricks - that don't feel good. I felt fine yesterday despite my mom's ominous warnings that I needed to be taking Wellness Formula and Zycam and everything else in addition to the Emergen-C or however it likes to call itself that I did take. Until last night, when my throat got strange again, so I took three more Emergen-Cs or whatever and went to bed. Lately I've been sleeping like a very tired and comfortable person, but last night my eyes kept fluttering and my mind wouldn't shut up. I slept a little but an hour later, cold, I looked at my watch. I fell asleep again but it was restless unsleeping sleep and I woke up around 5. I could feel all the energy in my body, I was ready to go. If it were warmer or lighter I'd have gotten up and done something. White blood cells. Like Voltron. Haven't responded to the latest unwanted text message, which was: Hey so how has everything been going for you up there? At least he didn't put 4 u, which his first text was full of. I didn't respond to the message before this, where he was asking about the weather. I didn't respond to the first one. I didn't call him back after the message he left for me. I don't know this guy, you see. I've seen him three times. I'm not into it. He's the brother of my oldest friend here, though, and they are the nicest family in the United States. Haven't heard about my application for the house. I'm steeling myself. What if I don't get it? What if I do get it? Much like my peptalk last night. I don't know what I want, and what if things don't work out my way? What then, huh? I get hung up, always hung up. (Rob Brezsny's preface today was nice.)
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