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- Dear fuckface honeybuns, did you know that when you broke your three-month silent treatment I was shaking? I heard the tell-tale clink sound, the sound I'd heard thousands of times before coming from you, thousands of times, but it's been silent for more than three months... TWO DOG YEARS... Today I stayed online, perversely, tempting you, daring you, and finally you took the bait. Finally. Could you tell I was shaking? Could you see that through the letters that flew half a thousand miles through thin air to your computer screen? And did you notice how much we had to say to each other, even though it was all bullshit? Did you notice that? You can bring up some stupid obscure band that we've never even mentioned to each other and have a conversation about it that will shoot off in a thousand different directions? Do you know how much I've missed you? Yes you do you fuckhead because you miss me too, don't pretend you don't. I was sitting on the third floor next to a piano doing my homework when *clink* which means someone's talking to me and I know it's you, I don't even have to look, and there it is, yes. You say something, and something more, and something more, and something more, and I start to respond and think, wait, that fucker, I'm not going to write back right away. But I do anyway. Back and forth back and forth, I'm in a chair on the third floor, the sun is shining in through the glass roof. You are in Seattle at your new job. Why are you working there? Would you please just do something that makes you happy for once? I could wring your neck. And OH MY GOD you've done it again because this was going to be it, this was the last week, I was going to block you (I had told myself) because Kevin is coming here with my guitar from you and then that would be that. But now here you've gone and entered my world again thank you goddamnit I love you. AGAIN. I'm too scared to get online tonight so I think I won't and I'll work off my nervous energy by cleaning my house and making myself some delicious stir fry and for the first time in months I am not ravenously hungry.
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