Sunday night, oh
Sunday, Jul. 24, 2005 - 20:35

It was the most rock and roll weekend I've had in a while. Kathleen kept touching my boobs. I was drinking everyone's water, and beer. Someone was touching my shoulder. I told someone about the truck I used to drive in high school. Sarah and Kathleen were dancing with some girl. I don't dance, neither does the cute boy. I was smoking cigarettes, or pretending to, I don't know how many. I had an unlit one in my hand, the cute boy gave me his that he'd just lit and took mine. Then there was that look he gave me as he looked at me and lit a cigarette. Which is disgusting, you say, and I would agree except you didn't see how sexy it was.

I climbed a tree - the first attempt was ugly, and Kathleen kept imitating me. We went to Kevin's because he wanted to get high, but he was paranoid about us thinking he was a filthy pig. He didn't want us using his bathroom, but we had to go. I was laid out on Kevin's couch and I had my legs wrapped around him. He said, "This is the only time in my life I'll be between a woman's legs." Kevin and Kathleen got into a spat about homosexuality and heterosexuality which continued to the other place we went to. It was a downer, no one wanted to drink their drinks. I just had water, which I either drank or didn't drink, I don't remember. Sarah had gotten high too and was getting paranoid and was trying to force me into sharing a cab with her. I didn't want to take a fucking cab, I wanted to take the fucking bus. Or I'd walk home. No, they said. - That's the thing about friends, when you don't have any you can do whatever the fuck you want to do and no one gives a shit.

I like Kathleen! She and Sarah were saying I'm cute, Kathleen said she's not a lesbian but I'm cute, and then I stopped paying attention. At one point they were talking about linguistics - that doesn't belong in a bar! The boy said I'm funny and that I have an offensive defense (offensive as in the opposite of defense, not as in offending). Then he said the thing about cracking my shell. I can't remember what we were talking about. It might have been his hand on my shoulder, and he tried to put his arm through mine but my shell is too hard and he was unsuccessful.

I woke up at 4, as you know, and then spent most of the rest of the day trying to be asleep. Last night I went to see Kinski and it was a miserable night, I felt like shit, it was hot and sticky and crowded and smoky and drunk people are fucking annoying when you're hungover. It was so miserable but Kinski kicks so much ass that it was overall a totally awesome night.

I must have smelled really good. Usually I get left alone, but last night people wanted to talk to me. And when the music was playing! - shut the fuck up, asshole, I'm not here to meet drunk fucks like you.

At 2 I was walking back home with a loaf of bread and an Odwalla Superfood or whatever. I took a shower, took some sleeping pills, put on a sleeping mask and earplugs, and stayed in bed until 1:00 this afternoon. Rock star!