I wrote 3 entries today; but wait, I thought of another, a fourth; but wait, fuck, I forgot. I'll take a shower, maybe I'll remember it and come back. Anyway, here's the beginning of my stupid horse story.
Sunday, May. 08, 2005 - 22:41

This would be my third entry of the day, and ... ahhhhgggg, arrrrragagagg I can't even write anything right now, it's just something about assignments that turns me into a big ball of lard, lazy and listless and unable to do anything.

HERE'S MY STUPID STORY. IT'S NOT EVEN WRITTEN YET, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO WRITE, I CAN'T WRITE FICKTION, I CAN'T EVEN SPELL IT, I'M THE WORST STUDENT THAT EVER LIVED, DO YOU WANT TO KNOW MY GPA FROM COLLEGE? TOO BAD, I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER IT.

I'M TRYING TO CHANGE THE SUBJECT BUT I CAN'T LET MYSELF DO THAT. Moron, just write the stupid story!

Okay, fine, here's my dumb story.

...

Starting now.

See, I thought, ha ha, I could kill all these annoying pop stars, I could kill off Britney Spears and Xtina Aguilera and Mariah Carey AND Celine Dion! I could have my horse Avril do that! But then I thought, dude, that's the lamest thing I've ever heard, it's fine to have a murderous horse named Avril, but don't go too far with it, it's almost too much as it is.

...

The trail into the ravine was treacherous, overgrown and muddy after the rain. Hank, our guide, suggested that everyone dismount and lead their horses down a trail farther on that was less steep. I was reluctant to get off my horse � I was a more experienced rider than the others, and even though it was only the first day of the trip my horse and I had an understanding. We made a good team. So, after the rest of the group had left for the other path, I steered Avril down the original way.

We made it down easily, almost effortlessly. I dismounted and found a carrot in my pack. I gave it to Avril, and when she finished chewing she bowed her head, as if to say thank you.

Hank came into the clearing a few minutes later and was surprised to see us there.

"I decided to go down the first trail," I said. "I didn't want to dismount."

He walked over to pet Avril�s nose.

�She�s a good horse,� I said.

�She�s Canadian,� he said.

�She�s very thin,� I said.

�Don�t let that fool you," he said. "She�s high spirited, and possibly murderous.�

�Oh I don�t think she�ll try to throw me, she�s been very calm.�

�Well, be careful.�

He went to meet the others. When he'd gone I said to Avril, "He thinks you�re going to buck me off." She shook her head, then looked off towards where Jim had gone. The others had finally gotten down. There seemed to be a heated discussion going on. As they got closer I could hear what they were saying.

The blonde girl in the front had a whiny, high-pitched voice. "Alls I know is, you told us to go down this trail, and if she thinks she's too good to go with the group, then she can just turn around and go back."

"Yeah, and how come we had to walk through all this mud and she gets to ride?" said the brown-haired girl at the back. "My boots are like totally ruined now. It's totally not fair."

The girl in the middle said to the brown-haired one, "Well why the hell'd you wear pink suede boots into the jungle? Like it's her fault you're an idiot, I'm sure."

"Oh my god did you hear what she just said to me?" the brown-haired girl yelled at Hank. Hank didn't answer.

By this time they had come into the clearing. Avril's ears were laid back on her head. I tried to soothe her by petting her neck.

ANYWAY AVRIL ENDS UP KILLING ONE OF THEM, THE MOST ANNOYING ONE FIRST, MAYBE THE PINK SUEDE BOOTS ONE, THAT'S SUPPOSED TO BE MARIAH CAREY, AND THEN AVRIL TRIES TO BURY HER, BUT HORSES AREN'T GOOD AT BURYING AND SO IT DOESN'T REALLY WORK AND WE FIND THE BODY AND I SUSPECT, based on the horseshoe-shaped bruise on the person's forehead, or perhaps the horseshoeprints in the mud, THAT AVRIL IS THE CULPRIT. It's some sort of female empowerment trek into the jungle. The end.

I think I'll have them read my grilled cheese story tomorrow. I suck!

My gpa I think was 3.92, and I was annoyed because my high school gpa was 3.94 and I wanted my ... well, I didn't really care, but I got two Bs my freshman year and then every semester after that I got my gpa up just a little, like a hundredth of a point ever semester, and I just wanted to see how high I could get it, but then I got two Bs (I think) my last semester because I decided to take two more retarded retarded classes in order to get a teaching certificate that I didn't even want but only had to take a few more classes to get.