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- It feels like fall here today - this endless summer is ending, I guess. I can't wear shorts and a t-shirt all year long. My legs are better tanned right now than they've been since I stopped trying to tan - biking is a good thing for vitamin D levels. The weather turned today, this cold has just come in, although it's easy for me to think it's just this place, here, home, and back where I live it's still summery. I always freak out about fall but I haven't this year because I hadn't felt it coming yet. Not that fall is bad - I like it very much - I just hate the end of summer. I have a job interview next week. I would be thrilled to get a new job. My job has always been stressful but with all the changes of the last year it's become absolutely unpleasant. I would love to get this job, not just because it's an actual editor position but also because it would be a completely different mindset. The downside is it's just .6 FTE, although that's perfect for this semester while I'm teaching. Come January, though, I'd have to find something to supplement my income a bit. That downside might be an upside. I'd like to be able to enjoy life again. It's impossible for me to see beyond the next week. My landlords might sell the house where I'm living. I may or may not ever get new downstairs neighbors (and have to share the yard again), I may or may not have to move out. I may or may not get a new job. I may or may not ever get on the radio again. I may or may not have a good running season next year. I may or may not continue hanging out with the person who has had the biggest impact on my life. I may or may not... It's nice to be home for the weekend, to sleep in my room and feel this nice lake air on my skin and in my lungs. I'm not really prepared or focused on the race tomorrow (I have to remind myself that I'm running a half marathon tomorrow morning) but I've been doing this for five years now, with varying degrees of intensity and success. My sister is doing well. She still harbors hope of reconciliation with her husband, which worries me, but she's making all the preparations for an independent life. But she's planning to go back there next week to get her stuff and I worry that she'll get stuck again. Such is life, sometimes. Sometimes you don't know what's going to happen. Sometimes you do. All I can do is try to be the best person I can be.
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