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tired but optimistic, glad the decade is almost over Rob Brezsny wrote this for me a couple weeks ago: PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Have you been toiling away earnestly at the exhausting homework that life has dumped on you this past year? Have you kept the faith even when you've been fooled and confused? Have you applied yourself with a pure heart to the maddening details and puzzling riddles you've been asked to master? If you've been less than conscientious at doing these tasks, the next two months will bring you a series of tricky final exams. But if you *have* been doing your due diligence, then you're on the brink of graduating from boring old problems that you have been studying and studying and studying for a long time. Do we dare hope that you will soon be free of a history that has repeated itself ad nauseam? Yes, I think we do dare. Thanks, Rob Brezsny. I've thought about this a lot. I don't quite know how to answer your questions. I've tried, and I've worked hard, but there's always more that I could have done, so maybe it wasn't enough. Also, if being delusional and creating my own reality counts as keeping the faith, then yes, I have kept the faith. I don't know. I'm tired. The next two months are going to be hard work still - why am I moving out again? - but I hope it works out. I think it will. I still have more couches in Seattle to sleep on than I do in the town where I've lived the last three years. I think it's because I don't drink as much. Anyway, Rob Brezsny, thanks for this, it was nice to read.
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