All about poo.
Tuesday, Mar. 27, 2007 - 00:02

Allow me to make some stuff up and then pretend I know what I'm talking about, okay?

I'm not a doctor, and I know that's probably surprising, because I do have what could be described as an authoritarian air about me. But it's true, I'm not. What I'm going to tell you is all made up. But it's probably right, too, so it won't hurt you to believe it. I'm a Pisces, I know things.

See, we have these guys who live inside us. They have long names that are often abbreviated. They are good guys. They live in our intestines. And I don't really know what they do but I'm guessing that what they do is eat our poo. They eat our poo to make it the poopiest poo it can possibly be.

Without these guys, our poo would be full of things that don't need to go into poo, things that don't need to be pooped out. So they eat the poo that's not poopy enough, and then they poo into our poo (probably), and we poo it all out in the form of really poopy poo.

Sometimes these little guys go away. Maybe they die and we poo out all their little dead corpses. And then, since we don't have their help with our poo, we have poo problems. Without our little friends, woe is us.

You can get new little guys, though. You can buy them in a bottle, or they also come in yogurt and other things. So eat yogurt, or take your pills, to ensure pure poopy poo.