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I have conquered the world twice today I read the night before last about books: they have to have a reason and they have to have a purpose. I'm not doing anything. I bought a new notebook, not exactly what I wanted, but maybe it will work. It's a Black n' Red quad. Some fancy schmancy thing at the beginning, you scan it and it does magic or something. Something silly. I bought it because it was on sale. I began writing in red ink but it's not really working. I don't have a reason or a purpose. Or if I do I'm not clear about it. It's hard to approach. In my recent travels I realized that traveling is something I need to do, it's not just a luxury or a time waster or anything like that. I think better at 30,000 feet. I flew away from Seattle - I packed my suitcase, I went to the airport, I walked through the terminal and boarded a plane. We flew away. No I'm sure we weren't at 30,000 feet but you know what I mean. I think better up high. Going someplace - I've worried about whether my wanderlust was just escapism, avoidism. But I hadn't gone anywhere since Costa Rica - that was nearly a year ago. Ten months. Traveling reminds me of who I am and what I want. Where I'm from, where I want to go, what I want to do, how I want to be. It resets me. I need to be in airports, I need to see people coming and going. I need to live out of a suitcase periodically. I need to see the stars below me and other sappy things. Sentimentality embarrasses me and I know I have a tendency to do it but still - I need to travel. Wondrous things happen and I wish I hadn't just typed 'wondrous', jesus christ. 'Wonderful' would have sufficed, or 'amazing' or 'awesome' or even just 'good'. There is no need for this silly pseudo-literate pomposity. I have a title, I have a couple ideas, but an approach... it's difficult. Also, like I said, sentimentality embarrasses me, and how do I manage to be honest and crushing and get it all across without being sappy or stupid? It's difficult. It's sunny. I'm going for a walk.
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