A book club meeting about Robinson Crusoe, followed by me talking about myself and stuff, and happy new year, okay?
Friday, Dec. 31, 2004 - 12:37

Today we will have our final meeting of This Diary's Book Club for the year, and also it's the final meeting for Robinson Crusoe. And since you didn't read it I'll just talk about it myself again and you'll just sit there and be quiet throughout the meeting, okay?

Okay.

I finally finished Robinson Crusoe on the drive to Seattle in my dad's truck pulling the Uhaul half-full of my stuff. I'm glad I read it, despite all the suffering and hardship and many hours of labor it took me to get through it, and now I have seven things to say about it.

First of all, damn that guy can complain. I mean, he SURVIVED two shipwrecks, he SURVIVED twenty-five years or whatever being on an island, he left and was very rich and got married and had kids, he was attacked by pirates but lived, he got taken as a slave but ESCAPED, and all the guy can do is COMPLAIN through a 5000 page one-chapter book. He says he's really unlucky, but no, fucker, you were REALLY LUCKY, SO JUST SHUT THE HELL UP, BUCKO.

Second, why did he have to tell us MORE THAN ONCE about every little thing he did? He repeated himself all the time, and, I don't really care how long it took him to build a fence, and I certainly don't care about it twice. But it was like he was justifying his existence, trying to show how industrious he was, trying to show us that he didn't waste his time jerking off.

Third, you know he did some jerking off, and he never wrote about that. Also, his man Friday, I think he was really into him, if you know what I mean, and he didn't talk about that either.

Fourth, he was very pompous towards the natives. I also just typed 'superious', which was a typo, and I don't think it's a word, but I think it fits well. He was very superious, and I guess that's the way they were, and it's very mean and uncomfortizing, but it's historically interesting.

Fifth, were there really cannibals in the Caribbean? Wait, was it the Caribbean? I can't remember.

Sixth, I think the guy probably went a little crazy, but he doesn't talk about that either, he just keeps on talking superiously and self-righteously.

Seventh, and finally, I'm glad I read it even though I toiled and suffered for many many hours, even though there are no chapters or pictures in it, even though he repeated himself over and over, despite his superious nature. It was interesting, and historically interesting, and, you know, humans are amazing. It's amazing what a person can do, what a person's body can do, the way we can manipulate our environments, the things we can live through, etc.

Upon discovering the labor and toil associated with the book, I resolved to read a fun book for the next book club book, because reading this book was very unpleasant and cost me many hours of labor and suffering, and so I wished to read a book that would cause only diversion and pleasure, unlike this book, which brought with it only pain and suffering, and so I decided, it sounding lighter and more in the nature of the type of book I next wanted to read, being not as serious in subject as this last, to read I'm With The Band by super groupie Pamela Des Barres.

Maybe I will, and maybe I won't. We'll see. If you want to read that one you can put in your two cents. I probably won't listen to you even if you do, but you won't anyway, will you! And after all I do for you too!

I am currently reading three books because I am retarded: Great Expectations (the book I am officially reading), a book about women and Islam (which a friend loaned to me and which I haven't even opened yet), and a book about diaries and why people write them, and that's a very timely subject for me because I've been wondering why I have a journal and why I have this top secret online diary (along with, um, three others) and what the point is and stuff, and who I think I'm writing for, and whether I want it all burned upon my expiration.

It's funny, I pretend I'm a "writer" but reading isn't very important to me. I prefer consuming music rather than words.

Blah blah blah, the end.