More about Mr. Pooh's colon
Wensday, July 25, 2001 - 10:08

I was mucho tired last night but had a hard time getting to sleep because Mr. Pooh was tossing and turning and fidgeting and moving. I finally made him get up and take a Tylenol PM. Then, not four hours later, I woke up because I couldn't breathe. I was suffocating. The air in my bedroom had been replaced by a giant fart, the stinkiest fart ever. I tried to hide from it under my pillow, but it was there too. I started flopping around and saying "pew! pew!" so that Mr. Pooh would know that I knew he'd farted. Then I got up, got my pillow and my blankey, and went downstairs to sleep on the couch. I couldn't get to sleep again for a long time because it's scary down here at night, so I started wondering if I'd made a mistake and if sleeping in a fart really wasn't that bad after all. But it was, it reaLLY WAS.

I haven't been back to the bedroom yet. I'm dreading it, because a fart that is so huge and so stinky that it fills up a whole room and wakes people up probably has a lot of staying power. It's probably stuck in the mattress. Eww.