dear place[not person]: I miss you[and you]
Tuesday, Apr. 03, 2007 - 17:16

Dear Seattle,

It recently occurred to me how little I'd been crying lately - in fact I hadn't been crying at all. Then unfortunate circumstances conspired to bring about tears. In fact it was the watching of the first season of Grey's Anatomy on DVD.

Why would that make me cry? Because, Seattle, it showed me shots of you. And I miss you! I could see the building I worked in - there, that tall building right next to that other tall building, and if you pause it and squint your eyes you could probably see the floor I worked on.

I saw your water. I miss your water! I used to run next to your water, I used to look at your water and take pictures of it.

On the plane back from Costa Rica we circled over your downtown and I looked down and knew that all my friends were down there, somewhere, and I was happy to be getting back to see them.

One day at work I had to take a cab out to Bellevue and on the ride back I saw the twinkling of your lights in the dusk and got teary-eyed, thinking about how you meant nothing to me without my friends.

That wasn't entirely true, because Seattle also means Ballard, which means sunshine and flowers and the Sunset and pho and fresh air and Sonic Boom and the Ballard bridge.

Seattle also means late nights in bars or clubs, getting shitfaced with my friends or watching my favorite bands.

Seattle also means baseball games and Green Lake and Thai food and good coffee and the Seattle Center - and the Seattle Center means something else entirely which is probably kind of still the thing I'm missing the most. Yes, still, Seattle means other things and other people but most of all Seattle means one thing to me and I miss that thing more than any other thing. Still.

Moving to you, Seattle, was starting something and it turned out to be not what I was expecting at all. It was much better than that, because it was real and what I was expecting was just imaginary.

So things don't turn out the way you think they will, hmmph.

If I moved back to you, Seattle, what then?