Robot paranoia
Rursday, September 20, 2001 x 3 - 16:09

I was actually really sad when I wrote the last entry. I was all, "Everyone knows something I don't. I'm so dumb and clueless. I don't get it. I don't get anything." I was very Eeyore-like. But I just reread it and it doesn't sound like I was sad. But I was.

Then Miss CrazyLady signed my guestbook, and at first I thought it was funny. I was all, "Ha ha, she's pretending like my robot theory is true! Ha ha!" But then I realized it wasn't funny; it's terrifying. It really is true. Everyone's a robot. All the other dairyland diaries are written by robots. All my buddies are robots. So tell me, robot buddies, what do you want from me? Eh? I bet you're trying to buddy up to me so that I'll agree to meet you IRL, and then you'll kill me and the robots will all rejoice because I'm the last Mohican and you will have won.

Anyway, I remembered today that I'd turned my "notes" on sometime last week or something, and today I wondered if anyone had written me a "note", and holy cow, Neenster had! She said that I rock! But now I realize that she's a robot too and was just doing her robot duty according to the master plan, buttering me up so I could be eliminated.

But it won't be that easy, you robots. I am totally on to you.

Oh yeah, and I'm not all Eeyore-like anymore because I saw some of my friends and they were being all nice and fun with me, and so I didn't feel like they thought that I didn't get it. But now I realize that they're robots, and they're not really my friends. Crap.

I wonder if Miss Kitty's a robot?